Tuesday, November 3, 2009

What Are Your Insecurities? By Lynn Lawson

Lynn Lawson

Everyone has insecurities. Whether you feel your nose is a little crooked; you’re not as intelligent as others around you; or you feel you need to shed a few pounds to be at your best; we all feel there are changes we can make to make us feel better about ourselves.


One of my insecurities has always been that I’m more of an introvert. Even though I was a cheerleader in high school, love to perform, participated in lots of group activities throughout my life, and actively seek opportunities to lead, I still consider myself a more reserved person (maybe an introvert with extrovert tendencies). While I am funny to those who really know me (kind of a nerdy goof ball), I still find myself pretty quiet (definitely not shy) around those who don’t know me well. I can honestly say that in party settings, I am not the “go to” person for fun.


I love to have fun, but I love to be in control, too. That’s probably the root of the insecurity, I guess. I never enjoy feeling “out of my element”. And, I sometimes avoid situations in which I feel out of control. However, I also balance this insecurity by placing myself in some of these same situations.


For me, being more introverted allows me to manage my life better. So, to an extent, it serves me well. But, if it ever gets to a point where I cannot be comfortable without being in control, then I’ll know I have a problem. My goal continues to be to challenge myself to experience bouts of free reign in my life, so that I can loosen more and more of my self-restraint.


When you look at yourself, what do you see and how do you feel about yourself? Small levels of insecurity are common in all people. But when insecurity debilitates your life, you have to consider why you succumb to anxieties about yourself. What is the root cause of your insecurity? If you don’t identify the root cause, your potential for a better life can be strangled by the uncertainties you feel about yourself.


Ask yourself these questions to determine your level of insecurity:


1. Am I shy or uneasy with strangers?
2. Do I wish I was smarter?
3. Do I wish I was better looking?
4. Am I overly cautious?
5. Do I think I’m an emotionally weak person?


If you have more yes than no answers, then you may have an issue with insecurity. If so, you’ll need to restructure your thoughts and perceptions about yourself. You can do this by replacing the negative mental energy of your insecurity with positive action.


For example, if you wish you were smarter, rather than ruminating on your feeling of inadequacy, you can choose to learn more about a subject of interest to you. In this instance, taking the time to learn while worrying less about your personal anxieties will give you the confidence you need to gradually banish this thought from your mind.


This same method can be used for any type of insecurity, but you also have to remember to stay in balance. Overcompensating in your life because of insecurity proves futile, as well. Just remember, worry without action is just as destructive as too much action due to little self-worth.


Resource: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=299690&ca=Self

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