What Are Your Insecurities? By Lynn Lawson

Everyone has insecurities. Whether you feel your nose is a little crooked; you’re not as intelligent as others around you; or you feel you need to shed a few pounds to be at your best; we all feel there are changes we can make to make us feel better about ourselves.

One of my insecurities has always been that I’m more of an introvert. Even though I was a cheerleader in high school, love to perform, participated in lots of group activities throughout my life, and actively seek opportunities to lead, I still consider myself a more reserved person (maybe an introvert with extrovert tendencies). While I am funny to those who really know me (kind of a nerdy goof ball), I still find myself pretty quiet (definitely not shy) around those who don’t know me well. I can honestly say that in party settings, I am not the “go to” person for fun.

I love to have fun, but I love to be in control, too. That’s probably the root of the insecurity, I guess. I never enjoy feeling “out of my element”. And, I sometimes avoid situations in which I feel out of control. However, I also balance this insecurity by placing myself in some of these same situations.

For me, being more introverted allows me to manage my life better. So, to an extent, it serves me well. But, if it ever gets to a point where I cannot be comfortable without being in control, then I’ll know I have a problem. My goal continues to be to challenge myself to experience bouts of free reign in my life, so that I can loosen more and more of my self-restraint.

When you look at yourself, what do you see and how do you feel about yourself? Small levels of insecurity are common in all people. But when insecurity debilitates your life, you have to consider why you succumb to anxieties about yourself. What is the root cause of your insecurity? If you don’t identify the root cause, your potential for a better life can be strangled by the uncertainties you feel about yourself.

Ask yourself these questions to determine your level of insecurity:

1. Am I shy or uneasy with strangers?
2. Do I wish I was smarter?
3. Do I wish I was better looking?
4. Am I overly cautious?
5. Do I think I’m an emotionally weak person?

If you have more yes than no answers, then you may have an issue with insecurity. If so, you’ll need to restructure your thoughts and perceptions about yourself. You can do this by replacing the negative mental energy of your insecurity with positive action.

For example, if you wish you were smarter, rather than ruminating on your feeling of inadequacy, you can choose to learn more about a subject of interest to you. In this instance, taking the time to learn while worrying less about your personal anxieties will give you the confidence you need to gradually banish this thought from your mind.

This same method can be used for any type of insecurity, but you also have to remember to stay in balance. Overcompensating in your life because of insecurity proves futile, as well. Just remember, worry without action is just as destructive as too much action due to little self-worth.

Resource: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=299690&ca=Self

Five Effective Tips in Managing Your Busy Day By Brent McNutt

Almost all of us live a busy life. Students need to go to school on time. They have to make sure that they prepare for all their subjects. Working moms on the other hand has to wake up early. They have to attend to the needs of her family, prepare the breakfast, and get ready for work. While dads help out, read his paper, check on his things, get ready, and drop the kids to school.

All of us have errands to run. Others have to squeeze in some important appointments while working. Here are some tips that will help you manage your affairs more effectively.

1. Make a to-do list for the entire week. This does not mean that you have to make a schedule for the entire week. Just list down the things you need to accomplish before the week ends. This includes paying the bills, grocery shopping, visiting your parents or friends, and/or filing important documents. This will help you plan what to do during your free day. It will also help you squeeze in some of the things you can during your break in the office.

2. Before you call it a day, prepare a list of the things you need to do the following day. Prioritize. If you need to visit a friend in the hospital, see what time you will be available and make sure that the hospital allows visitation during those time. A list is a good way to remind you of the things that needs to be done. It will also keep your activities organized.

3. Check for the two things you can do at the same time. While taking a break, you can probably look for cheap landau scrubs for your wife. You know how busy nurses are. They barely have time to eat their lunch. She will surely appreciate this kind of gesture.

4. Do the things you need to do during the scheduled time. If it is time for you to work, work. Take the break when it is time to do so. You will not finish everything on time if you do not follow your schedule.

5. Do not try to do all the things in a day. This is why you are prioritizing. Place the things that need your immediate attention on the top of your list. This will entail that you need to finish them first before you do the rest of the list. If you are unable to finish them during the day, place them on top of your list the next day.

All of us have things to do. We have respective duties that keep us busy. However, we also have free time. We can use this to help our loved ones. You can check the internet to find cheap landau scrubs for your partner while you sip your coffee during your break. You can also manage your time better if you plan and organize the things you need to do ahead of time. This will allow you maximize your free time and will ensure that you have done all the important things first.

Resource: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=299226&ca=Self

Create Your World By Your World By James Heller

“Simply give others a bit of yourself; a thoughtful act, a helpful idea, a word of appreciation, a lift over a rough spot, a sense of understanding, or a timely suggestion. You take something out of your mind, garnished in kindness out of your heart, and put it into the other person’s mind and heart.” Charles H. Burr

Words, words, words. Written words, spoken words, signed words. If we are going to be really successful in this world, no matter what you do, you need to be able to use words to create the results you are seeking. Unfortunately the vast majority of people do not understand the power of words. We think that we are just speaking, but words create or destroy. They create or destroy people.

A UCLA study of one-year-olds found that the child hears the word ‘no’ more than 400 times per day. So by the time a child is four, he’s been told ‘no’ more than half a million times. The bottom line is that toddlers from all cultures and across all time lines learn what to do by constantly being told what not to do. This conditioning carries on when we get to school – don’t talk in class, don’t color outside the lines, don’t run in the hallways, don’t give a wrong answer, don’t …

From this study we see that words are being used to control people. However, it is also true that a child’s creativity, desire to examine, and curiosity begin to die after being told to conform so many times.

Let’s turn our attention to the creative power of words. It really doesn’t matter whether you are doing a live presentation on stage, or you are talking to people on the telephone or one-to-one personally. There are two very important aspects to consider when opening our mouths to speak.

The first is our message. We need to know what we are talking about. We have to be knowledgeable about the topic. This is the heart of the talk. If you do not speak with some understanding and authority you might as well stay in your seat. You will not be able to help anyone. You do not have to be the ‘expert’ but you do have to be convinced that the subject is worthwhile to those you are speaking to.

What do you want to communicate to the people? Will what you are offering help others improve their work or personal lives? Could what you are speaking about or even selling be the solution to their problems? Will this help them achieve their goals in life? Will this meet their dreams?

The second is our signature. Our signature is defined as “any unique, distinguishing aspect, feature, or mark.” This is where you let your personality come through in the presentation. This is when the presentation comes alive.

Your signature includes your body language – your posture, eye contact, facial expressions and other body movements before and during the presentation. Eye contact is important. I have had to sit through presentations with the person doing the talking and he is looking at the ceiling. If he isn’t going to talk to me then he might as well sit down and mail me the information to read. He might actually have something that I’m interested in but if he isn’t looking at the audience then I’m not listening.

This also carries to the phone conversations. Even though we can’t see each other we can tell if the person on the other end is smiling. We can tell if they really want to be on the call. For those of us who use the phone to present our business opportunity this is a very important thing to understand. Our voice – the pitch, inflections, the tone – all convey our attitude. If you are just there to make a sale they will know it. If you are there because you think this opportunity will be of benefit to them then they will listen.

What are your words saying? Be careful because you are creating or destroying by what comes out of your mouth. You are not only creating or destroying their future but your own as well.

James Heller

Resource: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=209015&ca=Self

Can Drinking and Drugging Improve Your Social Life? By Tom Horvath

Yes, but...

In the first section let’s discuss how drugs and alcohol can actually have a beneficial effect on your social life (or at least appear to). In the second section let’s discuss why drug and alcohol use can still be a bad idea for you.

One of the most frequent reasons people use drugs, and especially alcohol, is to improve their social ability, either in social groups, or on dates: 'I didn't know how to enjoy myself with others unless I did this. And I could go on a date more easily.' Related to this benefit of using is the possibility of overcoming social awkwardness: 'When I did this I didn't feel insecure, bashful, shy, ill at ease, inadequate, or left out.'

Perhaps you don’t think you belong to any group. It is easy to join a group of other users/drinkers by joining in their activity: 'When I did this, I knew that I fit in with them, that I was one of them. By doing it I could be involved with others I would not have been able to be involved with otherwise, because they wouldn't have accepted me.'

Sometimes we are already in a group, and we get pressure to drink or use. The easiest way to deal with this pressure is to give in to it: 'When others put pressure on me, it was just easier to do it.' Or, in the group we already belong to, we want to feel more important: 'By doing it I felt that I was important and special, I was somebody.'

When conflict comes up, perhaps in a group, but more often in a couple or family, one way to respond is to drink or use, which can have the momentary effect of blocking out the conflict: “This was a way to deal with the conflict we had. I couldn't cope with him/her (or a group) very well otherwise.'

Sometimes the group we are interested in communicating with is society in general, and we want to assert our freedom: 'By doing this I could show others that I do what I want to do, not what others want me to do.' Sometimes the group is our family, and especially our (little) children, from whom we want to escape: 'They would have driven me crazy otherwise!'

So you may be thinking, “this is an impressive list of benefits of drinking and drugging.” Indeed, it is. This list helps explain why so many people drink and drug!

So why wouldn’t everyone drink and drug? There are two primary reasons. The examples given here show how drinking/drugging provides a short-term escape or coping device for the underlying problem, but also does not provide a real solution. Which means that if you don’t find a real solution, you just tend to keep drinking and drugging to deal with the problem.

You could keep drinking and drugging to deal with problems (of any type). But there is a good chance the drinking and drugging will over time become a bigger problem than the original problem. The risk of creating an even bigger problem is the second primary reason not to rely on drinking/drugging to improve your social life!

Resource: http://www.isnare.com/?aid=300925&ca=Self